D.A. OF THE DAY - MONDAY JUNE 6TH

This Mermaid is Jail Bait:



Florida cops thought there was something fishy when they reeled in a suspect in several odd home invasions -- after she told them she only swam up to the beachfront houses so she could "play mermaid."

Tanya Gerlach's wet-and-wild adventure ended when she made her way into a residence that was occupied -- and told the owner she had been hired to water the plants there. When the victim called her husband to check on that story, he said he had no clue what she was talking about, leading the woman to dial 911.

When officers arrived on the scene to haul her away, Gerlach said she'd found a set of keys to the house and decided it would be fun to "play mermaid" and “pretend to live there.”

WILLY WONKA MEETS WALTER WHITE

A five-year-old in Ireland nearly ended up with more than a mere sugar high after he found, and almost ate a chocolate egg that was stuffed with a bag of meth -- instead of the toy surprise that was supposed to be inside.

The boy, whose family was not identified, was playing in the bushes outside his home when he found the Kinder Egg, a treat that's banned in the U.S. because the toys inside could pose a choking hazard. Fortunately, the kid was confused enough by the bag of dope that he didn't go any further, and handed it over to his dad, who took it to cops.

What's next, Breaking Bad Happy Meals?

THAT'S THE WAY THE CARJACKING CRUMBLES

A Florida man went on an udder-ly ridiculous crime spree last week, carjacking a woman, then driving from convenience store to convenience store, stealing milk and cookies at every stop.

Robert Smith seemed to be in a pleasant enough mood when he forced the woman from her car and told her to "have a good [effing] day," but things got weird after he sped off. The 43-year-old went unnoticed for a while, pulling into gas stations and other locations where he loaded up on moo juice and sweets, but eventually cops spotted him and pursued him on a high-speed chase that ended when he crashed into a parked car.

Smith told officers he didn't remember most of what he'd done that day, but did confess to stealing the car -- and told the deputies that they'd nabbed him just as he was about to start "robbing every dope dealer in Lakeland to teach them a lesson."